Saturday, August 7, 2010

Awesome God

I apologize that this may be a lengthy post, but i so often post my heart aches I have to post the good things too. I have to give God his glory.

Yesterday (aug 6) and today have been good days for me. I might could even say great. I smiled and i was happy. I am so full with the wonderment (hope that's how you spell it, geesh i hope it's a real word, but anywho) of what God is doing for me i don't know where to begin. Let's see, let me start with Friday. I texts from my Fab girls which always puts a smile on my face and brings me comfort. My day started with noon prayer at my church (which i so desperately needed). It was awesome. I got to cry out before God from my heart. Yes i can do this at home, which at times I do. But it wasn't just about me, it was about the needs of others, and for a reason i can't explain it felt good. It was just a nice release. You all were in my heart, I may not have been ablel to name names but I know God heard me and i know that he knew too;o)

That night kicked off our annual women's conference. The speaker was awesome. Just awesome! God really used her. She acknowledged the fact that not all babies get to go home with there families. That sometimes they don' t make it and how we often wonder why. Then and there i knew that word was for me. But sometimes God doesn't give us the why. His thinking is above our own. But we are appointed for purpose we have purpose. There are lessons in the suffering. (not just this situation but other situations that she talked about as well) One of them she touched on is patience. She talked about Hannah praying to God for a son. She talked about how Hannah told God that she would give the child back to him. Can you see how AWESOME God is! He heard my cries. He spoke to me. She also asked, what are we willing to give up. She talked about how we want everything instantly and on our time instead of waiting on God!
She then went on talking about other hardships and sufferings in our lives. She told her story of being raped by a family member, of wanting to take her own life. But God! He saved her. and though it took time. He healed her. I wish i could type the whole story because it is an amazin one. But the moral of her talk was that, to be healed from past hurts, to forgive others for wrongs done, to get you through, to bring you comfort, there is but one name to call on and that name is JESUS! Yes that one name is so powerful, able to do all.

I just loved it, because she touched on a lot of things that i had been thinking and feeling. In that moment i learned to just listen to God. I learned that i don't need that validation that i sometimes look for to make sure it's God, because i already know. His word is good enough, more than good enough really.

It was even more amazing because in attendance that night was a pg woman who looked to be just a month or two of where i should be now and normally i would have fallen to pieces and left out crying before the service even began. But i didn't . I was able to focus on God. Think on his promises and i made it through. and it felt good.

Last night I knew that i am on my way to healing. I claimed my healing. I know that it will still hurt at times but I am getting there and that felt good. I also thought of many of you. especially Angie ( one of our Fab 5) I know that she is hurting so much now, but I know that it's gonna get better for her. I know that God is with her. Angie know that you are prayed for.



Then this morning we had our second day of the conference. It was awesome. One speaker touched on something that stuck with me.

She said that there is a difference between a hurt and a wound. A hurt is like a scrape or cut. we can put a bandaid on it and just wait for it to hea. But a wouldn is deep. It takes time and care to heal. You have to tend to it daily. Clean it out and dress it.

It made me think of this community of BLM's. We often speak of being hurt and heartbroken, but we are more than that. We are wounded and it's gonna take time for us to heal. So to heck with the time that the world thinks we should be " Over it" . and we will never be over it, but we can get through and we can live and we can hope. The only one that matters in telling us that time is God and when that time comes he will do it. and of course there is but one cure and his name is Jesus.


2Sam22:7 In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried to my God: and he did hear my voice out of his temple, and my cry did enter into his ears.

Psalm116:1
I love the LORD, because he hath heard my voice and my supplications.


Loving my Angels

8 comments:

Devon said...

beautiful post...your inspiration is amazing!

Antoinette said...

I want to thank you for your kind words dear friend. I think of you often. I also want to say how amazing i think it is that you and your 'fab5' can all comfort and love each other from around the world. i have 'met' some amazing mothers as well and they lift me so often. it is so true about waiting on God and us wanting things done yesterday. I guess it is just our culture. we are so spoiled with everything else, the ONE thing we do not have control over really brings out our impatience. i wish i knew why this has to happen to all of us and why we need to learn the lessons this way *sigh* but really truly i hope you do get your happy COMPLETE ending...((hugs))

Lori said...

I just love how God used so many this weekend in your life!!!! Lots of love and prayers for you, friend!!!
xoxoxo

Parents of the Princess and Duchess said...

What a great post. Isn't it amazing how God uses people to touch areas of our lives just when we need it the most? It is good to know you are having some happy days lately. You're faith is truly an inspiration. Thinking and praying for you each day...

Amy

Tabitha said...

Very inspirational and sounds like an awesome weekend! Thank you so much for sharing. It was something I really needed to hear today.

DeniFay said...

Oh Grace, how I love reading your posts! They are always truth! God uses you in such amazing ways and I am grateful to be one of your Fab girls! Thank you for sharing these words and lessons and thank you for just being amazing, beautiful you!!

I'm so happy you're having some happy days, it seemed like a lot of bad days going around there for a lot of us, I'm praying that the clouds lift and we always can see His face, even when it remains cloudy!

So much love to you my sweet friend!

klarsen said...

What a beautiful post, Shandrea. Thank you so much for sharing. He may not speak through burning bushes anymore, but He DOES still speak to us. Love you xoxo

Annie said...

So glad you were able to be uplifted! Praying for you.

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